ideas:

but with a big giant paper mache sun head, stalking his old school friend.
he'll have a myspace, facebook and twitter page, all the tools of a good stalker. he'll add as many people as he possibly can. he'll upload his stalker photos and tag his stalk-eee in his photos. he'll update his twitter with his where abouts and his current thoughts.

gosh darn it, the sun want's friends and he's going to get them.